Tribute to my grandfather - 

When my grandfather passed away, I was seven. I don't have many memories with him except for a few. My grandfather resided in Santa Barbara, California and we to visited him quite often. I rememeber the house vividly - the stairs spiraled around the foyer and were carpeted in a dull mint green. The backyard was small and green with tons of lavender, which attracted bees that I was sacred of. My grandfather didn't have a TV. He never decorated for any holidays, so the house looked the same year after year, and season after season. My favorite part of his house was the office. There was one large desk in the center with no computer. To the left there were inset shelves with lots of classic model cars in immaculate condition. He also had a tiny plastic RAV 4 eerily similar to the one in the garage. My grandfather also had a large replica of the bomber plane he flew training for the war. The room was painted white with one large window and no dust. Erik and I used to look at all of the cars in awe, and then my mom would call us to the kitchen and we would sit and eat and drink iced tea.

Now, a baby blue replica Cadillac convertible sits on my white desk, a constant reminder of my grandfather. 

spring break

This spring break, my parents and I drove to West Hollywood, California. my favorite part about going to California is the drive because I love listening to music by myself in the back seat while looking at the valleys of Indio and Coachella, and all the windmills. The next day my mom, dad, and I drove to Santa Monica to shop and eat lunch. I love the location of Santa monica and can't wait to spend more time there in the summer. the following day, which was my favorite, my mom and I explored Beverly Hills and Melrose Avenue. In Beverly Hills, my mom and I walked along Rodeo Drive and I tried on a few prom dresses. My favorite part about Beverly Hills is the crowd. It ranges from wealthy California natives and visitors shopping as usual to tourists photographer the Fendi, Saint Laurent, and Chanel shop signs. Before stopping for lunch, we stopped in a small candy boutique called Sugarfina. Sugarfina stocks half of their candy from confectioners all over the globe - including Sweden, France, and Germany. The cutest thing about Sugarfina is that every candy is packaged in small clear cubes with baby blue labels. I picked out a cube filled with small fish and shells shaped candy from Paris, France for myself and a cube of watermelon, raspberry, and strawberry flavored Swedish Fish for my brother. My mom decided on green apple flavored gummy bears for my father. Next we ate lunch at my moms favorite Bevery Hills restaurant, Villa Blanca. My mom loves it because it's owned by her favorite housewife on the Real Housewives of Bevery Hills. Since we still had a lot of time before my dad returned to work, we decided to go walk along Melrose Avenue. The most interesting stop was the world famous pink wall outside the Paul Smith store. The wall is painted a Pepto-Bismol like shade of pink and is the third most Instagrammed spot in LA.

 The best part about this trip was our hotel room. The Andaz used to be called the Hyatt House, which was nicknamed the Riot House by it's famous guests. Since they used to throw TV's and other items off the balconies, when it was renovated the owners sealed in the balconies with glass. From our enclosed balcony I could see all of LA. At night I would lay down and watch the hundreds of cars drive past on Sunset Blvd. until the early hours of the morning.

In this last quarter of junior year, I am excited to play lacrosse and finish with a high GPA. Junior year has been quite difficult compared to freshmen and sophomore years and I'm excited to get it over with. I'm also really excited for summer so I can work more and go to California for the entire month of July! 

Modesty

In a TED Talk, Nigerian novelist Chimamamda Ngozi Adichie once said, “We teach girls shame. Close your legs; cover yourself. We make them feel as though being born female, they’re already guilty of something” (Adichie). Modesty is many different things. To some, “modesty” is shyly deflecting a compliment. To Islamists, “modesty” is wearing loose clothing to make sure a man is not tempted to be lustful. To Catholic schoolteachers, “modesty” is a plaid skirt no shorter than three inches above the knee, to make sure the pubescent boys do not get distracted. “Modesty” is associated with the words shame, immorality, honor, worth, and guilt. Modesty is the attempt to deceive others into thinking one is humble, physically and mentally, which is why a discussion of the word modesty is important because that is not its literal definition.

Modesty’s denotation is quite different than its connotation. Modesty is derived from the Latin word “modestia,” which means sense of honor, correctness of conduct, sober, gentle, and temperate (Harper). It was first used in the 1530’s and meant self-control. In the 1550’s, it evolved to mean having a low opinion of oneself. By the 1560’s it was targeted almost exclusively at women, being defined as “womanly propriety.” In these times, modesty was all about balance and self-control. This is especially important because in recent times it seems as though modesty has been forced upon women. It has taken both a negative and positive connotation. Webster’s Revised Unabridged Dictionary defines modesty in two ways: a “natural delicacy or shame regarding personal charms and the sexual relation, purity of thought and manners, due regard for propriety in speech or action” and “the quality or state of being modest, that lowly temper which accompanies a moderate estimate or ones worth or importance.” Modesty no longer has a positive denotation regarding honor or gentleness. Modesty is now about lack of confidence, physically and emotionally. Synonyms of modesty include self-effacement, self-consciousness, and humility; which do not have positive connotations.

            In some cultures, modesty is not a choice; it is the law. To Islamic cultures, a modest woman is one who demands respect and honor. Ironically, women are forced to wear full face veils, loose clothing, and fabric to cover their feet. They are not allowed to wear perfume ("Islamic State Tightens Modesty Laws for Women"). The Islamic state’s reasoning for this ruling is so women do not become “a feast for the eyes” ("Islamic State Tightens Modesty Laws for Women"). Although women appreciate the protection, they are not small children that need to be looked after. Women are strong, and no amount of fabric is going to change that. Instead of teaching Islamic women to cover every square inch of their bodies and avoid perfume, the Islamic state should demand better behavior of its men. Modesty is a personal choice – a woman should be respected no matter what she is wearing.

            Western culture is on the other end of the spectrum when it comes to modesty. The media knows no bounds when it comes to the dignity of women.  Women’s bodies are hypersexualized in the media, but it is still illegal for a woman to go topless or breastfeed in public in thirty-five states. Sex worker Violet Rose once said, “It is illegal for women to go topless in most cities, yet you can buy a magazine of a woman without her top on at any 7-Eleven store. So, you can sell breasts, but you cannot wear breasts, in America” (Smith). Women are treated as an object and placed on a pedestal, and when the ideal woman demands respect, she is shamed. When a woman decides to wear something provocative, she is shamed. The laws in Islamic culture ensure this will not happen by disguising a women’s beauty, but women are people just like men are. It is only necessary for a woman to be modest when a man is being immoral. Western culture must cease to objectify women and control their modesty.

            Modesty is not just a way of dressing – it is a mindset too. How a woman dresses is only half of what it really means. One’s mindset, morals, and beliefs are what make a humble woman modest. A girl may wear a knee length dress with a high neckline, but dance in a promiscuous way. She appears to be modest to the eye, but in reality she is immodest at heart. This is the kind of “modesty” seen at catholic schools – since girls cannot get the attention they crave through clothes, they try to get it through inappropriate dancing. A girl can dress as modestly as she likes but it means nothing with any morals.

“Modesty” is not fixed. “Modesty” is not three inches about the knee or a full face veil. “Modesty” is relative, a choice, a personal decision regarding the person involved. A “modest” person is not one who rejects compliments and dons a potato sack to avoid making the opposite sex uncomfortable. A modest person is one who acknowledges their worth and others, demands respect, and dresses as she likes. The definition of modesty today is nothing like its original meaning, which goes to prove that the definition is open to interpretation.

Works Cited

Adichie, Chimamanda Ngozi. “The Danger of a Single Story.” TED. Jul. 2009. Lecture.

Harper, Douglas. "Modesty (N.)." Online Etymology Dictionary. Web. 9 Feb. 2015.

“Islamic State Tightens Modesty Laws for Women.” The Jerusalem Post. 25 July 2014. Web. 9 Feb. 2015.

“Modesty.” Merriam-Webster. Merriam-Webster. Web. 9 Feb. 2015.

Smith, Robyn. "Women, Not Just Men, Deserve the Right to Free Their Nipples." The Independent Florida Alligator. 28 July 2014. Web. 9 Feb. 2015.

Greetings,

Every time I meet someone new, they almost always pronounce my name wrong. I've never taken offence to it - most of the time I think it's funny or I'm a little embarrassed. I have a name that ninety-nine percent of people have never seen - Taline. My mom named me Taline because it is of Armenian origin, and she is full Armenian along with her parents. I used to view my name as sort of a curse because of how awkward it is for people to pronounce, and I envied my brother for his short and simple name - Erik. Every time I have a substitute teacher I brace myself for their interesting pronunciation. The most common one is tall-line, which comes as no surprise because that's exactly how my name looks. I've also gotten many others such as tay-line or talin. I remember finding a variation of my name on the map in freshmen year geography - Tallinn, the capital of Estonia. "Tallin" has been a nickname that my friends have given me since then. When I was younger, my family used to refer to me as "taliney beany". I'm not really sure who or how he or she came up with that one or why it stuck. To this day my grampa is the only one who calls me that. I've decided to title my blog "tall-lean" as sort of a pun on how to correctly pronounce my name.

Taline